Kebob Lust – Olive Juice - OpShop

If you’ve ever been to a cocktail party before, then you know the benefits of showing up on a full stomach. Our focus was initially elsewhere; on simply having the proper attire to attend. We had discovered Hastings Epicurious weekend; celebrating wine, food and entertainment. Really, it was another good excuse to welcome spring into Hawke’s Bay, the Okanagan of New Zealand. It all started in Hastings with HOT PINK and the launch of iconic rosé wines. Joseph was decked out in all black with a glitzy dollar store hat, while I had managed to scrounge up a fake orchid belt. We were amongst a myriad of pink wigs, painted nails, feather boas and pink ties. An eclectic couple on stilts welcomed us to the event while commenting on Joseph’s less than formal footwear. We weren’t insulted; only flattered that they’d agree to pose with us for a picture.

Eying everything from mini quiches and spring-rolls to mini cupcakes and kebabs, we quickly formulated a plan for obtaining hors devours. You might say that we had kebob lust. With servers scurrying past us, en route to the masses of people, we were unable to secure any sort of eye contact or manage polite small talk. We’d have to resort to more aggressive means in order to satisfy our appetites. And so it became a mad dash for food, a situating of oneself just outside the kitchen, a matter of politely reaching over the shoulder of a stranger. Sinking our teeth into succulent chicken, we breathed a sigh of relief. Yum! We spent the rest of the evening people watching, visiting with winery reps and enjoying the live entertainment.

The fun didn’t stop there. The next morning, we found ourselves at Seleni Estates for their first ever annual Olive Festival. We sampled a host of tasty products; olive oil, saffron jelly, damson plum jams, date chutney, port blue cheese, etc. Salivating? Next on the list and not an official part of Epicurious’ weekend; Napier’s National Aquarium. We arrived for 2 o’clock feeding time after a nice stroll along the rocky beach. Joseph was in heaven in the oceanarium, as sting rays glided overtop and sharks unassumingly grinned at us. We enjoyed an up-close view of a kiwi-bird, my first ever. Humorous antics of sea horses managed to capture our attention for some time, but then again we weren’t in any hurry to leave. It was fun to take a stroll in the downtown and check out some of the buildings. A 1931 earthquake had left Napier devastated and resulted in a mass 2 year reconstruction, meaning that most of the buildings are built in the Art Deco architectural style.

What would a visit to Napier be without a picture beside Pania of the Reef? She’s rivalled second only to Copenhagen’s Little Mermaid. Pania seemed to boast larger feet, but who am I to judge? Legend tells that Pania lived in the sea but left to dwell on land with her human beau. When called by her people to return to the sea for a final visit, Pania was trapped and unable to return to her love on the land. How terrible! Joseph stepped in as her crush for long enough to get a picture.

We found ourselves back at the Opera House for Saturday night’s OpShop concert; one of New Zealand’s best loved bands. We had never heard them before, but would describe them as the Kiwi version of Coldplay. Their opening act, The Early Birds, proved entertaining. While we didn’t entirely love their style of music, we did have fun renaming members of the band based on their appearance. Little Chimp and Big Chimp were our favourites, on bass and guitar.

Sunday rolled around too quickly and we were on our way to the Farmer’s Market. Tell me what’s better than buying heaps of fresh asparagus and tamarillos?

If I could build a house out of artisan bread
If I could make a chimney out of cheese
With chutney as my mortar
Now that would be the bee’s knees!

The steps would be fashioned out of bread loaves
Of whole-wheat, spelt and rye
We’d sit ourselves upon them
And dream of tamarillo pie!

Our wonderful weekend in Hastings only wetted our appetite for more! We are loving every minute of our time here!

A Savoury Journey

This weekend we stayed closer to home and our taste buds embarked on a flavourful trip. Friday was our 14th month anniversary (yes, we are cheesy enough to celebrate that), and Kristine bumped split-pea soup in favour of an organically-fed Foxton chicken. Stuffed with lemon slices and whole garlic cloves and complimented with mahogany gravy, the alabaster meat was positively transcendent. The best part is that the bones went straightaway into the stock pot!

We had another go at the Manawatu Gorge Scenic Reserve hike, this time from the other side. New life was sprouting everywhere, fresh and green. We found three new lookout points, one of which was a picnic table by a cow pasture. Wind turbines from the wind farm stood 70 metres tall with blades turning eerily silent. I didn’t see any ‘no trespassing’ signs so I crawled through the barbed wire fence and walked right up to one of those monstrous machines. I was so awestruck with my eyes cast heavenward that I planted one foot in the most fertile patch of pasture, compliments of some mammoth bovine.

Kristine was not as weary as I so she busily whisked eggs in the kitchen – hooray, soufflé! Rangiwahians have bestowed us with gifts of fresh eggs and venison. The soufflé rose proud and perfect and was feather light.

This morning before church we had whole wheat pancakes with stone-ground flour from the de Molen windmill. Maple syrup reserves are direly low. If anyone is coming to visit, we request you bring a suitcaseful.

School Update

Thank you all for reading our posts and making us feel special. We treasure your comments, such as, “Why do you have so many pictures of coffee?” Listen – this place is like Wonka’s factory for delicious hot beverages! How could we not?!? We have also included a picture of a colossal prehistoric coffee bean. Alright, so it’s not a coffee bean – but we have hope for a genetically engineered Jurassic cappuccino future.

Others have commented, “Aren’t you there to teach? Why do we never hear about school?” Fine. I’ll take you through my day.

I was the first teacher at school this morning, meaning I beat Clarissa today. I rang the bell, took the role, and we got right into our lessons. I began by yelling, “Cry ‘Havoc,’ and let slip the dogs of war” in my most fearsome voice. The Shakespearean delivery suffered in the Canadian accent, but the students sat riveted while I delivered my lesson on stepping up their vocabulary with ‘havoc’ and other words.

We broke for morning tea and the kids had a bit of a run around in the back paddock. I rang the bell again and we were back at it for reading and maths before lunch. The afternoon classes were broken up when a delivery van got stuck in mud in the aforementioned paddock and I pulled my strongest students to help me push it out. Half of them were barefoot, some hadn’t even worn shoes today. Jack ended up with mud up to his knees and I swore the heavens would fall if he left muddy bare footprints throughout the school. He got himself sorted out and we played netball for the rest of the arvo.

And, yes, this is an average monotonous day so I have been reluctant to bore you with dreary recollections.

A common question is, “Are you bored out in the sticks?” The answer is no. I have introduced Kristine to the wonders of Star Trek and Battlestar Galactica. When I stubbed my toe the other night, she quoted The Final Frontier and said, “Your pain runs deep. Share it with me!”

In your face, all you who sniggered while I suffered through “So You Think You Can Dance”: I have a wife who watches Battlestar Galactica and enjoys it. Highlights from our last trip to Wellington were the alien autopsy [pictured] and the Cylon detector [pictured].

The last question also came from my detractors, “So Joseph, how are you coping without video games?” As if dangling my dark mistress of distraction in front of me could lure me back into the abyss. I tell you I don’t play videogames here – I LIVE THEM!

A poem

Windy Welly, AKA: Wellington,
We finally made it back
It took a while to get here
Foxton’s Spring Fling led us off-track

Then there was de Molen,
The dutch style flour mill
We had to stop and see it
Wind mills, they’re such a thrill!

Colossal squid – you caught me
You’re really quite a sight!
With eyes the size of soccer balls
And half a tonne of might

Te Papa could have swallowed us
It’s a museum full of sights
But we had to get to the botanical gardens
Before sundown and city lights

The Wellington Cable Car,
Since nineteen-hundred and two
Has taken friends and lovebirds
To the top for a city view

Hand in hand, we strolled
From roses to seasonal beds
We imagined the flowers in full bloom;
Bright purples, blues and reds

Carter observatory called us;
The planetarium too
We learned to spot the Southern Cross
And Venus' bright hue

No day would be complete
Without a savoury bit of fare!
Mac’s Brewery is the place to beat
We left without a care

Next day, we head to market
For kiwifruit and more
The wind is a modern hair stylist
As it chills you to the core

At last, met up with Ben & Darlene
For a drive along the coast
To a charming little café
Where they’ll serve you more than toast

Flooding along the state highways
Made it home with time to spare
Wellington, you’re wonderful
We’ll be back for fun and flair!

Joseph & Kristine’s Top 10

Things We Love About New Zealand:

1) The market! The kiwis take their markets seriously; start time – 6 am, end time – 10 am. Produce is fresh and at a fraction of the cost of what you’d pay at the supermarket. Joseph buys two dollar bouquets of fragrant flowers for Kristine. Kristine buys whiskey bacon from Edelweiss’ award winning butcher and whips up something savoury for Joseph. Together they buy huge bags of kiwifruit for under $2.

2) Daffodils – they bloom in abundance despite it being winter. Next up; rhododendrons!

3) No hidden sales tax! Forget odd amounts of change weighing down your change purse. Clerks will round up the cost and the change. Oh, and forget tipping in restaurants.

4) Cafes – they’ve got character and amazing fare. We have yet to be disappointed by a cappuccino or flat white; such artistic designs on the foam that you just have to take a picture! Passion Café, teach me how to make afghan cookies. Over the Bridge Café, we’ll meet again. Jolly Good Fellows, save us a piece of chocolate mousse cake!

5) Limited American influence – kiwis aren’t materialistic people. They don’t have mass amounts of unnecessary toys. They don’t worry about keeping up with the Jones’. They’re not a consumer credit reliant culture. Kiwis embrace simplicity.

6) Scenic Reserves & Bush Walks – No excuses for being lazy and inactive! There are beautiful and lush trails just about everywhere you look. Pack some trail mix, your camera and get moving. There are not enough hours in the day!

7) Landscape – lush, diverse, dramatic, breathtaking and extraordinary; just a few words to describe the scenery through our eyes. It’s impossible to fully capture through a photograph. Our regular drive into town feels like a medieval trail or one that was used by hobbits; relatively untouched and free of modern devices.

8) The Locals – they’re down to earth and very welcoming. Joseph’s got a hunting date with Bob and a drawing date with Peter. Kristine’s had coffee dates with Brigid the artist and Mariane the Dane. How many communities throw a welcome party for newcomers at the local hall? Oh, and the members of Knox Presbyterian are notorious for inviting newcomers home for lunch. How lovely!

9) The Animals – Watch out for wild turkeys and pheasants crossing the road! The tui will wake you up in the morning with a sweet warbling; much preferred over the call of a magpie! Springtime is lambing time – how cute! The possum might make a stir on the rooftop at night, but they’re harmless. We’re on the lookout for a real wingless kiwi bird; maybe at the zoo.

10) Travel Time – We are nestled deep in the hills of Rangiwahia; farm village central. And yet, a two hour drive will take us to either the wineries of Hawkes Bay, the beaches of New Plymouth or to the mineral hot springs of Taupo. Didn’t we used to drive 5 hours for a weekend in Edmonton?

Things We Miss About Canada:

1) Central Heating – Canadians are spoiled; to wake up without the fear of seeing ones breath or slipping into a pair of ice cold slippers. We do this by choice on a camping excursion; risk freezing. I don’t understand the logic behind insulated curtains. Shouldn’t walls be the better choice?

2) Electric Clothes Dryer – Not only is it an efficient time saver, but it also traps lint! We’ve grown to appreciate an ever changing display of clothes on the drying rack near the wood stove.

3) Toyota Highlander – it had guts! We lose a lot of steam going up hills in our ’95 Toyota Grandpa Camry. Joseph has the pedal through the floor and a speed of 50 while hot-shots leave us in the dust.

4) Aged cheddar cheese! Nothing beats a good chunk of Armstrong or smoked apple-wood. Although, a constant supply of camembert and brie shall keep us going while we’re here.

5) Broadband wireless internet – Want to know the latest news? Joseph would hop onto CNN or CBC. Miss an episode of Kristine’s favourite So You Think You Can Dance? Download it for free in a matter of minutes! This is our year to ‘’unwire’’.

6) Water Pressure – There was never a fear at home that you hadn’t rinsed out all the shampoo or conditioner. Showering is this great luxury to be enjoyed and savoured! We are making due with the shoulder level trickle, hoping it builds character.

7) Maple Syrup - Golden Syrup, you will never compare! Arataki honey, you’ll come close.

8) Rules of the Road - The roundabout seems to make sense, but help us out with who has the right-of-way when turning at an intersection! We’ll drive with an extra bit of caution and avoid getting flustered if honked at.

9) Staples & The Bay – Joseph loves his electronics and I love my Vera Moda sales! Oh well – no time for shopping when you’re exploring new treasures.

10) Family & Friends – Thank you for keeping us in your thoughts and prayers. We appreciate you following along on our blog. Keep the emails and letters coming – we love hearing from you!